Tuesday, August 24, 2010

A question about marriage to Senior Citizens, how do you see your spouse?

After being married for 40+ years and you and your spouse start the aging process, do you notice it right away? Does it bother you? Or do you still see that person you fell in love with years ago to look the same?A question about marriage to Senior Citizens, how do you see your spouse?
I see the physical changes, but that doesn't matter. I love her just the same. And in all sincerity we treat each other and believe that we are also each others best friend. No one will watch over me as much and as well as she for me and myself for her.A question about marriage to Senior Citizens, how do you see your spouse?
I don't have a spouse. I dumped him years ago. that's


why I've been so happy all these years.


Being married is HARD WORK.
I fell love with a girl and now I'm in love with a mature woman with a few more wrinkles -- she's more beautiful now and after loving her each day a little more, she's more of me than I am.
I've known my husband since we both were 12 years old and we got married at 18 (me) 19 (him). Have been married almost 40 years now. The aging process kind of sneaks up on you. One day you look in the mirror and think, ';Who is that old woman?'; I don't feel old but admit that I avoid mirrors. My husband is still very attractive to me, even with his grey hair and wrinkles. It is so true that physical beauty doesn't last but a good soul shines through. The medical problems that accumulate with the years are what bother me. It scares me when I realize my husband's health isn't 100% good.
He has a lot less hair and is a little forgetful. I call him my putz because he is so slow at everything. But I love him and I think I will keep him. Together 6 years and married 2 1/2 yrs.
Yes I have started to notice it now as my spouse is two years younger than I am and getting old real fast. Not active at all and likes to sit aorund the house or go shopping or out to eat and never likes to do anything that I like nor does she like to be an active person.


always complains how tired she is and how much she aches everyday but doesn't want to do anything about it.


I think the hardest part is watching her swallow pills evry night just to help her get along. I do mean legal pills like pain and blood presure etc. and I don't take any at all for anything.
i haven't noticed much difference in the old fart except 'where did the hair go?'we been married 5 years but together for 15 years,my mother knew him before i did,he dated one of my mums friends.my husbands health is gotten worse over the last 5 years,he has had 2 heart attacks and had heart stints,he has gone blind and very slow.most of his problems are from his diabetes.but we still are best buddies,and he still loves to flirt with all the old gals at the senior center,it wouldn't be him if he didn't.he will be 72 in March.god bless him
We were married when we were 24 and we are 56 now..I still see the handsome man I married. More distinguished maybe..but just as handsome.Just as kind and still the same man I am so much in love with. I still get butterflies when I look at him or think of him.
I do notice that his reactions have slowed down some


but then so have mine. That's what growing old together


means, you both lose things together.


He is not the tall, slim blonde biker I met 45years ago.


I am under no illusions about this tall, slim grey haired biker coming up to his 65th birthday.


Let you into a little secret, I wouldn't change a thing.
Havent noticed a thing. In fact he still looks the same to me!!! I dont see him any differently.


It might sound strange to a younger person but its absolutely true!!!
36 years ago she looked like Marilyn Monroe today she looks like AUNT B and I LOVE her even more a great mother and great grandma
Well, I've been single since 1981 - by choice, thank you.





My second husband was the love of my life and I adored him. He was a wonderful husband and a great ';Dad'; to my 2 kids from first marriage. Unfortunately, he had a ';zipper problem'; that I simply couldn't abide so, after several years of trying to close his zipper, we separated.





Now, he's my age, 67, no longer has trouble with his zipper and he looks wonderful. My kids see him all the time - even though he lives in a different state. He comes back several times a year to visit his family and see my kids...and his ';step-grandson';.





He was a beautiful young man and now is a beautiful older man. We often talk that we should have waited until we were 60 to marry - instead of marrying at 32-33. HA!





His hair has turned from jet black to silver, he wears 2 hearing aids, his belly is a little bigger, waist a little larger but he looks wonderful...
36 year's


Wow this is a good question. It is making me think. My husband did not work out or do manual labor but he had these nice arms....Nice shape muscular arms...You know I never thought about them....I never really notice how nice....How well shape his arms were without working at it...they were just arms but about a year ago they were gone...Just like that it seemed like he got the arms of a older man...It must have happened slowly but I did not notice it seemed to happen in one day....Does it bother me yes,a little....... He is just getting slight lines around the eyes so his faces lookes the same He is 58.... just his arms are not the same.....but 58 is not that old is it?


Edit I have to explain it doesn't matter his arms are not as muscular....We both anticipated gettin older but I was like waiting for the wrinkles not the shrinking.....I thought you got wrinkles then you shrunk,........For me I was 5'4 now am 5'3 and my eye lids are sagging ...I have been waiting for my crows feet and gray hair but instead I got shorter and my eye lids are dropping.... I had plan to grow old gracefully.....But I was and still am going to be okay with the gray and the wrinkles. I as mentally ready for that....At 53 I did not know I was going to shrink and have sagging lids .......


Live and learn....
I try to see her as the beautiful woman I married almost 39 years ago. Sometimes I am told I'll see her through black eyes.
We havnt been married quite that long but I can say with my hand on my heart that he has improved in every way imaginable - and I love him more now that I did the day I said ';I do'; - and I loved him a lot then!
we have been married for 45 yrs. I see his aging, and the grown kids and grandkids tease him about his bald spot, but I see him as I did 46 yrs ago when we started going out, tall and handsome with a full head of dark brown wavy hair and beautiful brown eyes. He is now 74 and stooped a little, with major health problems but I see only what I saw so many yrs ago, if anything our love has deepened.
He looks great to me Dear!! And, he always will. Age has done nothing but improve him in my eyes.
No, he is a totally different person, then, I suppose, so am I.
I have known my husband for almost 25 yrs, and seen him grow older, even tho I have been married to him for ony 4 yrs. To me, he looks just the same, only older. It hasn't bothered me, we are just growing older together, and when I look at him I just see the same sweet guy that I have always known. His smile hasn't changed at all, and when he laughs he looks 20 yrs younger, to me. I know he is losing his hair, and he has put on a few pounds, but he is still my guy. I guess I see him, and not his wrinkles.
Don't have 40 years under my belt but we're both older. I don't notice it at all. I'm just so surprised how young everybody else looks. LOL I don't age.....they just get younger looking. LOL





Now from my husbands standpoint....once menopause hit and went...well I did change. I was always so petite as an adult (fat as a kid) that it's hard not to notice the extra pounds. I'm just not as critical as he is when it comes to looks. If I was....I wouldn't have married him since he's not a ';stud muffin'; to begin with.





My own aging bothers the heck out of me. His doesn't bother me but he hasn't gone through ';typical'; changes. Still a full head of hair, no grey at all....more wrinkles but heck when you can't see it's that ';soft focus'; effect. LOL Tiny little pot belly but he's as skinny as a rail so it doesn't look like much more than getting some meat on his bones. His dad is 82 and he still has a full head of dark natural hair.....so I think he got some good aging genes. I on the other hand did not get any. I've kept my greying under wraps for years with the aid of Loreal....the rest just happened. Seemed like overnight to me.





I mentioned hair simply because that seems to be one thing that bothers men. Doesn't bother me so even if he was going bald it wouldn't matter.
We haven't been married 40+ years, only 19yrs, Tc was a strapping 6 footer and very fit and active when we got married but over the years he's lost quite a bit in height due to the arthritis in his spine and he's definately not as fit and active as he once was but to me he is and always will be my hubby and perfect in every way. We have a 7 year age gap (he's younger than me) but we seem to have both aged together. Him having grey hair isn't a problem coz he had grey hair when we got married. I wouldn't care if he was as bald as a coot and I wouldn't care if he shrunk down to 3 foot tall he would still be my perfect man. Nothing bothers me about him ageing....but typical woman I try all the new wrinkle busting lotions, which don't work without making your skin feel like its too small for your face and body lol.


We always say that we will grow old disgracefully and as long as we grow old together that's all that matters to me.
Physically, I see the same person after 32 years. True, we have both aged, but I don't see that. He is still a very handsome man. However, a year ago he had a stroke, and he has changed emotionally and mentally. I miss that part of him a lot. I still love him as much as I did, even more so.
See her the same way I saw her 44 years ago. We are a little plumper then we were when we got married. Hair has turned gray and we have lost some body (internal) parts through surgeries, but she still puts up with me.

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